My friend believes in God, so it's easy for him to look at item 5 and talk himself down from that. "It may seem like I'm having a series of lousy breaks, but certainly doesn't mean that God hates me. In fact, all of Christianity is based on the principle that God actually loves me. I guess I never really thought that God hated me. I was just expressing my frustration and anger in a sideways sort of way. In fact, I was making things worse by depriving myself of a source of comfort during a tough time. It's my lousy former boss who is to blame, and I'm certainly not going to grant Godlike powers to my lousy boss!"

So item 5 is gone in a puff of smoke, and my friend already feels better because now he remembers that God isn't toying with him; God is standing by his side and offering support.

So on to item 4. Attacking with logic will lead my friend to conclude that, while he is going through a rough time right now, that doesn't mean his entire life has always been awful. (He takes the time to actually count his blessings.) And again, it's just a job. He lost a job because of a lousy boss. And if he is not going to grant Godlike powers to his lousy boss, he is certainly also not going to give him the power to ruin his whole life."

And so item 4 is gone too. See how this works? Item 3 can be attacked the same way, simply by listing all of the people you don't happen to consider to be mean and cruel. This technique also uses the principle of meeting every 'hot' or 'bad' thought with a 'cool' or 'good' thought.

The art of attacking your bad feelings with logic is one of the primary tenets of Dr. David Burns' book, Feeling Good. I have recommended this book before, and I recommend it here again. Using this technique, you can chip away at any huge disaster in your life, and make it as small as possible. Granted, depending on the disaster, the problem may still be pretty large. But now it is as big as it deserves to be, and no bigger. And now matter what the problem is, it is already quite large enough and doesn't need magnification. Putting the problem into perspective will rob it of some of its power, and take away some of its emotional hold over you.

The power you take away from the disaster is power that you take for yourself. And the more power you take, the more power you are able to hold. It becomes a spiral, but not a vicious one. It becomes a self-healing, self-empowering spiral that, coupled with proper therapy, will one day bring you to a life of peace.