Warning: Triggering Topic
"Why Me?"
As I mentioned in my last article, humans are not good at answering "why" questions. I suggested that you work to get beyond the "why" so you can work on the other "W" questions: what now, when, etc.
The only problem is, it's extremely difficult to get beyond "why". I didn't intend to be glib, but I do think that this is a subject that deserves more attention. But, lest you get your hopes up, I am not going to be able to provide an answer to "why?"
In Old Testament times, there was an easy answer to "why". The book of Joshua records how Joshua led the tribes of Israel to the Promised Land. For instance, there was a city or state called Ai.
Joshua 8:18 -- Then the Lord said to Joshua, "Stretch out the sword that is in your hand toward Ai; for I will give it into your hand."
So in Joshua, victory was because the Lord granted it. Defeat was also because of the Lord:
Joshua 7:1 -- But the Israelites broke faith in regard to the devoted things: Achan son of Carmi son of Zabdi son of Zerah, of the tribe of Judah, took some of the devoted things; and the anger of the Lord burned against the Israelites.
Because of this, the Israelites were defeated. And it wasn't until they appeased God that they were victorious again.
Back then, things were simple. Bad things happened because God was mad at you. The problem is, some of that attitude has carried over into today. Survivors tend to be crippled by guilt anyway, and they tend to wonder if their suffering is because of something they did. But remember that the book of Joshua is from a long time ago, and things have changed. For instance, Joshua records that the Israelites conquered thirty one separate city-states, and in every case God had them kill every man, woman and child in them. That is not the kind of thing we do nowadays.
The Bible acknowledges that things have changed since Joshua's time. In the last article, we already discussed Job and Lamentations, which looked more deeply into these questions of "why". Remember that both books reject the simplistic notion that suffering is earned by the sufferer. And God accepts Job's defense that "I didn't do anything this bad!"
The Psalms are also a great place for frustration and questioning. Check out Psalm 13:
How long, O Lord? Will you forget me forever? How long will you hide your face from me? How long must I bear pain in my soul, and have sorrow in my heart all day long? How long shall my enemy be exalted over me? Consider and answer me, O Lord my God! Give light to my eyes, or I will sleep the sleep of death, and my enemy will say, "I have prevailed"; my foes will rejoice because I am shaken.
Sometimes, I find that psalm enormously comforting. It reminds me that it's not just me. It's not just you. Everyone in pain thinks those things, and it helps to know you're not the only one. In fact, it always seemed to me that the last passages of the psalm were kind of tacked onto the end:
But I trusted in your steadfast love; my heart shall rejoice in your salvation. I will sing to the Lord, because he has dealt bountifully with me.
Sounds like a different writer altogether, doesn't it? And if you're hurting, feel free to skip the ending passage.
Psalm 22:1-2 -- My God, my God, why have you forsaken me? Why are you so far from helping me, from the words of my groaning? O my God, I cry by day, but you do not answer; and by night, but find no rest.
Psalm 22 also has some softer passages in it; verses talking about the holiness of God. But if you're hurting, feel free to skip them. After all, when Jesus was on the cross, he skipped them too, and only uttered the first part.
Jesus suffered. He understands your suffering.
Biblical scholars think that King David wrote many of the psalms. David never stopped calling to God for help; he never stopped believing that he deserved God's help. And David is a guy who had sex with dozens of women; killed thousands of men in combat, and committed First Degree Murder by arranging for Bathsheeba's husband to be killed in battle. You've never done anything that bad. So remind yourself that you deserve God's help too.
